Getting Real

It takes so much energy to fake it spiritually and yet that is what I so often find myself doing. When I skip my personal time with God, I walk around thinking there must be a sign stamped across my forehead for everyone to see. Then, like an idiot, I totally overcompensate, speaking in spiritual jargon and  hoping my hurried morning without acknowledging God won't show itself when speaking to my husband, friends or employees. Sometimes, naturally, I blow my cover. Other times, supernaturally, God is much more graceful than I deserve Him to be.

I really believe he feels more grief than anger. The Bible does say He is slow to anger, and yet we see that by early Genesis, he is already feeling grief at having created humankind! I am so glad he loves us enough to feel something. He is so wonderful and I am so built up whenever He draws me close. When I am taking my time of solitude and seeking God, I remember that He is my breath and I can't live or do anything without Him. Take this Sunday, for instance.

This Sunday I was kneeling at the altar, seeking relief from a difficult and disappointing week, and He spoke to me clearly. My husband was leading a song for reflection and it was about to end. As I began to get up, God said, "Stay with Me longer". Now, the teens from the church were having a food sale fund raiser for the youth retreat following the service and I wanted to make sure they were all set, but I didn't dare budge. I quieted my spirit and let myself go. And he gave me strength. He lifted my spirits and reminded me that He sees my heart. Then I realized what His grief is really about. He knows what we are missing out on when we aren't spending time with Him. He is real and speaks real truths. That is what getting Real is all about.